Seriously, how are we spending over a half-trillion dollars a year on the military and ending up with this kind of Photoshop quagmire?

Not my best work, but worth a $2.3 million Pentagon allocation nonetheless.

Is this going to be used in Iraq? I thought that country was, for the most part, landlocked. Darn Pentagon still hasn't gotten the hang of geography!

what?

I was unaware of Bin Laden's plan to take over the US with a fleet of insurgent dinghies.

Have you been sick lately?
You might get better if you get a job and a haircut!

Thinking of retiring that same old jingoistic non-response to serious issues? Well think no more! That's never been your "thing" anyway! Best to sum it all up with these hit slogans that will NEVER go out of style with good, old-fashioned knuckle dragging hyper-nationalists:

-"You hate America!"
-"Love it or leave it!"
-"Why don't you move to (fill in current nation the pentagon is using for target practice here)!"

There, isn't that simple enough for you to understand? Why, you'd almost say it's a swell shortcut...to thinking!

But then sometimes I yell at the people running road races.

"Get a job!"